Just because it’s not always the way I want it, doesn’t mean that I can’t be loving, pleasant, civil and genuinely concerned about the goings on with my step children.
The baseline is, I love my stepchildren and I’d like to say I love them as much as if they were my own children but I can’t. Simply because well there are several reasons: One is that biologically they are not mine, secondly if they were I don’t know if I could have been objective as I like to think I have been these past 12 years and lastly I don’t know either how I would have behaved had I been their real father from cradle to their adulthood.
The truth is, I may have made many more gaffes had I been they’re from their birth and my emotional decisions along the way may have dramatically altered the course of their lives. And by the way I am not claiming that it would necessarily be for the better, because my own addictions may have screwed up their lives much worse than a man who was seemingly disengaged from their lives. His active non-involvement might have been innocuous compared to my self will run riot while I was actively drinking.
I am exactly where I need to be the lynch pin holding our lives together at the moment even though there are times when that pin was pulled on. And even in those instances I know they are happy that I am in their lives.
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