Things at home are unsettled once again. I keep having resentment poke it’s head through the hole in my heart. It keeps saying why am I in this situation? My wife says I don’t have to stay here. Which is a non-sequitir if I have ever heard one. What self-respecting man let’s his life unfold this way? Is it my own fear or is there a reluctance to change the environs because I see no alternative now? I am not sure. I have done my best even though I am expected to do still more. The biological father must be laughing at me, but that’s not what worries me. I think what’s on my mind is the fact that my wife is content to leave things status quo and not having much care how unhappy I am. There are moments of clarity and relative calm but I know there is a storm in the forecast.
I know that I am complicit in all that has happened but that does not mean that I have to sit by and take abuse just because someone thinks I deserve it or can take it. Eventually I will simply unhook my collar and…
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