The Ineffective Parent

As I continue to take psychology online I was studying about the ineffective parent. 
It never occurred to me that my parents neglected my needs but as I sit here I realize now that they did and they did mightily.  I recall that while growing up I needed outside references to help me make up my mind about myself.  My friends proved to be invaluable in endorsing the fact that I was indeed a good friend.  I know that that description is a rather broad generalization but at the time it meant a lot to me because I never felt I knew where I stood at home except when I was being chastised.  At times when my father was inebriated he might brag about me while I was in earshot but I never took those accolades seriously because I thought it was just his way of showing off. 

 I have lived with my own struggles as a stepparent because I had not been cognizant of   my own personal experience with mediocre parents. Little did I think that I might dole out my own brand of ineffective parenting to my own stepchildren? Who knows if they have been or not but I am sure that at times between my arrogance and silent scorn they wished they were someplace else. But for the most part I have been lucky not to have failed as miserably as my parents did.  They did the best they could with the resources they had. That piece of 20^th century psychobabble is just not enough not anymore anyway and it’s within my province to make sure that I don’t repeat the mistakes of my father and mother.