When my wife continues to play mommy with her adult married son I have to bite my tongue because it’s a role she cannot remove herself from. When you boil it down it is a show that I cannot direct or put the kibosh on. What is is. She loves her son in a way that I do not. She sees him as someone that she still needs to nurture. I see it as a way to keep him as a boy. Oh I cannot wait until he moves out and he has to pay his own bills. That should be the picture I want a front row seat to.
I am just a witness not the judge or jury. Even if I could be it’s a job I won’t fill out an application for.
4 comments:
Step-dad,
I have never realized how much I do to you emotionally. I see things with wide open eyes now and will do my best to get myself out of your house and repay you for everything that you have helped me with along the way. I am truly sorry to have caused so many problems. I know I was never the cause to your marriage with my mother but you have given her a life that I am truly happy she has, you are a blessing to her and she is in return for you but she came with a price being she had a son. I never wanted to cause any problems and tried my best not to but just being me is the problem so I will try to end this as soon as I can. What I can promise is, while I am still present under your roof, I will not hide behind my wife and you will see a major increase in my productivity around the house (dishes, cat box, garbage). I know me leaving for China for my last vacation is seen in your eye as crazy or not needed and it prolongs my stay in this house until I am able to save money to move out. I have told my wife that I would stay home and cancel my ticket to China to get a job and apartment by the time she returns but this just upsets her greatly, so I must go to China in light of my wife's emotions. I am sorry that this will prolong our stay. By no means do I bring bad emotions to this house or feeling s toward our relationship. There is no need for a private talk, there is just understanding between us and I will spend my life to give back to you what you have given to me.
I know you didn't son. However I have no one to vent with. Whenever I talk to your mother it becomes an argument. I love her too much to talk about it anymore. I just feel that I am feeling very insecure financially and I just didn't think you and Min would be here this long.
I do wish you would take a more active role in the house it would just make me feel I am not doing this all alone. Do you understand that part of it? I am totally responsible for 4 people.
And yes I know Min needs to see her family but look at it from my point of view. I would love to take off 2 months and not have to worry about the finances but I cannot.
Know that I love you that will always be and if anything every happened to your Mom God forbid I would always be there for you.
If I had a more stable financial outlook I might not be as fearful as I am. I don't want you to spend your life giving back to me I just want you and MIn to have a life of your own.
Gee I never thought you read my blogs. I am glad that you did.
Oh and please burn that hat.
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